Monday, August 11, 2008
When You Don't Fit the 'Type'
I am a loyal reader of your blog and I had a question. I am a lesbian who keeps running into the wrong women. I am a "femme" if you will, and I normally attract "studs". I don't know if you have an insight into the gay community or anything but femme means "girly" and stud means "manly". Just because I am feminine doesn't mean that I should or even need to be with someone who is masculine. In the area that I live in.... St. Louis, MO, it seems as if the girly lesbians HAVE to be with manly lesbians. I am not necessarily attracted to only masculinity, I am a lesbian for sake, but I'm wondering what I am doing wrong or am I doing something wrong? Do I live in the wrong place where lesbians are prone to the other side? To me, studs have complexes. Really, I don't agree with women trying to be manly. They over do it and they treat you worst them some of the real men out here. Im in love with women, so I don't know what to do. your thoughts on this please.....
Okay darling, I've never even kissed a girl so this is all new to me. But I'll try to answer your question from my perspective. If you want to date a girl that is more along your personality, then you have to go where girls like you would normally hang out. Since the femme is more feminine, perhaps try meeting her at the mall or beauty parlor versus the club or bar. You have to change your dynamics in order to achieve your goals.
It's a generalization to say that studs have complexes, it might be true for some, but not all studs have complexes. I've never been to Missouri but if it's like every other American city, there are people of every race, creed and sexual orientation. Perhaps it would work if you were the ones that made the choice and not wait for the lez to approach you. After all, logic states that the studs have more ego, hence confidence so they would be the ones doing the asking.
Flip the script, place an ad online with all your fabulous info and a cute pic and what you want in a girl. Make sure to state that you aren't interested in studs and then let the responses flood in. Pick and choose a few that you like and I'm sure you will find someone. Using the internet creates the 3rd wall of comfort so the girls that are shy would be more prone to respond to your ad. I used to Craigslist to find Norio using this method and three years later I'm still happily in love. So just think outside the 'box' and try someting different.
Labels: Dating, Girl Talk
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