Wednesday, June 21, 2006

4. Good Body

Now this is the post that will cause alot of dissension in the house. For starters, you have to bear in mind that men are super visual creatures. They are attracted more to a woman based on her looks than to her mind or anything else. Sure, it's shallow, but if you ask 9 out of every 10 guys, the first thing they notice about a woman is her body, a facial feature, her booty or some other body part.

After the whole dating and courtship phase is over, it's easy for one or both of you to slip into complacency and 'let yourself go'. After all, you've attracted and landed the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with, so why do you have to stress and keep gussying up?

If he can't love me when I'm fat then he's not the guy for me, you might say. Yeah, ok sweets, but honestly, if you have it in your power to keep your man attracted to you for a lifetime why would you give that up? He is in love with you, but he's also in love with your booty, your lips, your legs and your hair and everything else that makes the fabulous package that is you.

It's like cutting out your organs one by one. Without your spleen and pancreas, you can still live, but cut the heart, liver and lungs out--you're dead. That's how important attraction is. Taking bits and pieces off what initially attracted him to you might not affect you in the interim, but over time, and with you consistently slacking off, his attraction WILL turn to repulsion. There is a reason that during midlife crises alot of men tend to jump ship for the sexy secretary. It's not just because she's younger....it's because she's more toned, full of joie de vivre, more vibrant hence more enticing.

Honey, you have to keep yourself, your body and your beauty with the same care that you did when you didn't have a man. It's ok to slack off once in a while and parade around the house in sweats, giving little thought to makeup, perfume or deodorant, the former mainstays of your beauty. But when this slacking off becomes a habit, a routine for you, then you are slipping up in the catering aspect.

Yes I do agree that it's a shallow front we are catering to, and at the same time I do agree that there are some guys who actually don't care about looks. But majority of men do. And always will. Regardless of the fact that he's packing a beer gut instead of a six pack, he's going to want the babe on his arm to turn heads. And it's not only the men that are shallow, we women are too. We automatically pass judgment on ourselves, castigizing our looks, accessories and hair, making ourselves feel better that we look better than all the other women in the room. It's a vain aspect of human nature, but one that is there nonetheless.

So, even though you got your man, don't act like it's all over. Break out your sexy lingerie instead of the old T-shirt in bed a couple of times a week, keep wearing those thong panties instead of relegating them to the back of your closet and choosing your Bridget Jone's knickers. Keep the allure, keep the mystique, keep the effort to look fabulous. Keep on shaving your legs! In addition to actually garnering attention from your man, it has the added bonus of improving your self confidence and making you feel fabulous. So why give it up?

Keep your beauty routines, your hourly massage, your weekly appointments at the hair salon and manicurist. Dress up once in a while, go all out, even if you aren't going out, even if all you are doing is having dinner at home.

Don't use getting the rock on your finger as an excuse to cut lose and gain those pounds. Keep your gym routine, exercise and keep your body slim and trim. Even when you get pregnant, don't turn into the fat lady! Make healthy decisions while pregnant and only gain the required 20 lbs of pregnancy weight, something that you should try to take off when you do have the kid. It's hard with slower metabolisms and a more sedentary lifestyle to actually maintain the slim and trim figure you had in your 20s, but even if you are slightly off the mark, you've put the effort in, look fit, are healthy and you've come close.

My mom had four kids. Sure she never lost all of her baby weight, never got back to a slim 120lbs, but at the same time, standing next to all of us, she looks like my older sister. That's because she didn't let motherhood and marriage turn her into an old lady. Put care and dedication into your wardrobe. Still engage in those shopping sprees and keep up to date with fashion trends. Be the cool mom, who is always chic and stylish even with the passel of kids. Become a MILF (mother I'd like to fuck), gorgeous even in your dotage.

Keep your life! I cannot say this enough. Keeping your beauty routines, your therapeutic shopping sprees, your interest in fashion and beauty all add to your well being and happiness. That way it's not all about him. Or all about the kids. It's all about you as a family and how you are all growing together, even though sometimes you might be growing in different directions.

And while you are keeping yourself fabulous, a few reminders for him to do the same wouldn't go astray. Cook healthy dishes instead of zooming by for junk/fast food. Have family activities that involve going outdoors to play or a walk instead of just sitting around playing video games. Don't eat after 8 pm. All these are little steps, but when added together keep your family healthy and happy.

I'm not asking you to become a health freak or anything drastic like that, but be conscientious about your beauty, lifestyle choices, your body and your wardrobe. A little effort goes a looooong way.

Your thoughts?

Labels: All About Sex, Girl Talk

Posted by Vixen @ 12:50 AM :: 8 trainees letting it rip!

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