Thursday, November 08, 2007

When He's a Virgin

I have been reading your blog for a long while and I thought you could help with a little problem of mine... I have been seeing this guy for nearly 6 months now. He is 26, I am 25. We seem to get along great- he is wonderful, kind and considerate except for one little detail- we haven't had sex. My boy is apparently a virgin and so every time we get any near sex he backs off really quick. Is it possible to have a relationship with someone you haven't had sex with? Is sex really that important? Or is this something we can get over with time?

Hmmm, am I even the person to ask about this?

Yes, it's possible to have a relationship with someone you haven't had sex with. My sister was a virgin and they didn't have sex until they were married some 5 years after they met. Somehow they managed to develop a relationship without sex..but for me, that's not something I would sign on for.

If sex is important to you, and he's not giving up his virginity---then this will eventually be a deal-breaker. However, if you feel like you can wait on when he's ready...then it's doable. It just depends on you and your ideas and views around sex and how much you need it. It's rare that a woman does the waiting game (it's usually the other way around), however I feel that if you do want to give him his sexual space then stock up on some sex toys and batteries. Mistress can attest to the fabulousness of the Wanachi Vibe. You will be sexually frustrated more often times than not, especially since you are so attracted to him.

I don't feel like you should engage or pressure him into sex if he doesn't want to or isn't ready for it yet. There is a reason he's still a virgin at 26, so perhaps you should delve into his emotional state and reasoning before you try to push it. The relationship will have to grow at a slower pace in the intimacy and sexual department, but you two might be able to grow in leaps and bounds in other areas.

It's a gamble that might be worth it, if he really is all that ---but I do know that it's going to be harder for you not to rip his pants off and throw him down on the bed the more time you spend with him and the more you fall in love with him.

Good luck.

Labels: All About Sex, Ask Vixen

Posted by Vixen @ 2:34 AM :: 4 trainees letting it rip!

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