Friday, October 12, 2007
When He Misses His Ex
While getting soundly trounced at backgammon today, Norio and I started talking and somehow I brought up his ex and the fact that he hadn't heard from her in a while. She'd moved out of state and they have been able to keep a casual friendship even with me around. "Yeah, I'm surprised we haven't spoken in so long. I miss her," he stated.
Enter Vixen in her royally pissed and totally affronted mode. "WTF? Oh hell no you did not just say you missed your ex!!"
Granted he was being honest, but honestly---that's not something I would want to hear. Because somehow I equated that comment with the fact that he missed her presence, and missing her meant that somehow, I wasn't enough for him. I totally blew up, and turned the conversation into an argument, with him wishing desperately he hadn't blurted that out and using logic to pacify my emotions.
It's not that I think that he still has a thing for her, or that I feel threatened or insecure about their friendship. For me, it falls in the zone of one of the things that I DON'T WANT TO KNOW!
Ignorance in this case is absolute bliss, and admitting that you miss someone that I absolutely detest is not the recipe for getting a great blowjob.
But I digress (me and my dirty mind
When I finally let him get a word in edgewise, he was able to point out that missing someone that you shared a past with isn't grounds of betrayal. It's a natural human emotion that when it's not admitted could actually be construed as something else. He equated her with a period in his life that although it wasn't a fab relationship... his family life wasn't full of so much sorrow. So the parallel was that he missed his family. Tough sell, but he had enough emotion to convince me.
He truly didn't see what the big deal was, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I was perpetuating my dislike of his ex on the whole situation.
So, here's one for the forum...was I over-reacting? Or is missing your ex truly a sign that you aren't 100% happy where you are now? Or is it somewhere in the middle?
Your thoughts please...guys too!
Labels: Relationship issues
Posted by Vixen @ 3:44 AM ::
11 trainees letting it rip!
Talk to Me!