Wednesday, June 07, 2006
The Nagging Fishwife
I was at a party recently where a woman was
, yelling at her husband. It was barely drizzling outside when we stepped into the foyer. Apparently he had forgotten the umbrella at home and so she was going to have to get wet the few steps it would take her to get from the covered front door to the car---that he was going to walk in the rain to fetch for her so that her Majesty wouldn't get too wet. However, this wasn't enough for the lady. The poor man, even though he went out of his way to rectify his mistake, had to listen to her scold and scorn him for several minutes. All in the presence of strangers. I felt sorry for him. How in the world did he end up with a nagging fishwife?
Above all things ladies, if you remember nothing else, remember this---A Bad Girl does not become a nag when she doesn't get her way. There are multiple ways to get the message across that you are not happy with a certain situation. Usually, just stating it once will do the trick. Remember to use those communication words, "I feel; It hurt me when; I'm upset because;" State the problem and then let it go.
Once he gets that and he's trying to make things right and appease you---why not just accept the apology/gesture and move on? Honestly, some things are just not worth the fuss and bother of getting all dramatic about.
Sure, if he's cheating on you and you caught him red-handed, then go ahead and have a dramatic tirade worthy enough for an Oscar nomination. But if you are just irked because he forgot to take out the trash or do the dishes, get over yourself. In the bigger picture, these petty little incidences don't even matter. Let it roll off you, like water off a duck's back.
At the end of the day, you have a man that loves, respects, cherishes and cares for you. So really, why should you throw a fit when he forgets to TiVo your show? It's not the end of the world sweets. Instead of using your energy to abuse and insult him, taking down his masculinity with a few well picked barbs-- you would be better using it to find a solution for the problem.
Guys are problem solvers. It's what they do, it's what they excel at. Fixing the problem makes them feel like they are being the providers and knight in shining armor. It redeems them in your eyes and alleviates your distress. Sure not every woman likes to play the damsel-in-distress card but if he's the cause of the distress, then go ahead and dump it all in his lap. "Honey, here's the problem. Can you fix it please?
" would work out far better than, "I can't believe you, I told you 399 times to do this. You are a good for nothing lazy, SOB and----!!!
" Do you get my drift?
Remember, you catch more flies with honey then vinegar. So the next time things aren't going the way you want them too and you are about to have a bitch fit---take a deep breath, count to 10 (or 100) and let him find a way to fix it.
Posted by Vixen @ 3:00 AM ::
5 trainees letting it rip!
Talk to Me!