Bad Girl's Guide

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Attention Whores & Drama Queens

Definition: An attention whore is a drama queen who always has to have all eyes on her. She loves the attention, she lives for it. She's the friend who when you confide your problems to flips the script and all of a sudden makes everything all about her. She's the selfish lady that when you've just gotten dumped calls you to gush about this guy she's been dating. She wants everyone to notice her every single moment of everyday...everyone on the planet, from her peers to her superiors, her friends and even your own boyfriend.

She is the first to criticize anyone that even remotely tries to be better or do better, because she wants to keep everyone 'under her'. When you get a promotion, instead of genuine congratulations on your success, all you get is a derisive comment meant to shut you down or put you in your place. "Oh they only offered that to you to fill the minority requirement," she might snidely say.

In high school, she would be one of the Mean Girls. Perhaps that is where she cultivated her bitchiness.

At a job setting, she would be what is referred to as the Queen Bee, the popular girl that all the other women pretend to like even though they secretly hate. Meanwhile the men are all over her granting her favors while some are in awe of her. She's Veronica Lake, Naomi Campbell and Paris Hilton all rolled into one.

It's always about her life, her plans, her issues, her woes, her responsibilities and her drama. Noone else exists in her world except her. Anything outside of what's affecting her isn't 'her problem' so she doesn't even notice it. And when she does notice, she somehow manages to make a problem that isn't even hers all about her.

She's controlling, manipulative and egotistical. She's selfish, insanely possessive of her peons and feels that she 'owns' people. She plays everyone like pawns in her chess board. Anyone who objects or fights against her becomes an anathema.

When the light is taken away from her for a moment, she snatches it back with a comment designed to bring the spotlight firmly back in her direction. Without the attention, she becomes petulant and irritable, sometimes even falling into fits of anger and uncontrolled rage.

Although she might come off as arrogant and self-assured, all her issues arise from high levels of insecurity. The confidence that men thinks she exudes is all just a cleverly designed facade. She's probably more insecure than alot of people think. She gets power trips from her manipulations and this feeds her sense of self-worth.

I know as you are reading this, a few Attention Whores and Drama Queens have probably come to your mind both in your personal life and in the media. So how does a truly confidant Bad Girl deal with a Queen Bee?

Ignore her.

Ignore her Vix? Is that even a real strategy?

Yes. See the more attention you give her, the more you play into her games. The less attention you give her, the less power she has over you. You have to act like her antics don't affect or faze you in anyway.

It might be hard, especially since she's been the Queen Bee for years and you are just coming in as a rookie, but it is possible to get her to leave you alone just by not falling for her snare. Of course, she might try harder to get at you, and some of her comments might actually sting. But bear in mind that people only have as much control over you as you give them. Take that power/control from her and she has nothing over you. Nada. Zilch. Zip.

Wonder what happens when two Queen Bees are in a room together? Absolute mayhem...worse than something you would see on a soap opera. I was actually able to see it today and was quite caught up in the bouts of hilarity that assailed me. It was a power struggle of epic proportions, definitely something for the Guinness Book of Records.

Have you ever come across a queen bee/drama queen or attention whore? What is your story and how did you deal with it?

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Posted by Vixen @ 12:53 AM :: 4 trainees letting it rip!

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