Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Setting Firm Boundaries

I'm sure most of us have come across alot of women who have problems setting boundaries with the different men in their lives. They might feel constrained by morality, past history, fear, cowardice; or just have a hard time saying no. Some are just nice, genuinely caring and like to do the whole 'mothering and nurturing' bit. Others feel that they have to do certain things to keep the man happy and get him to stay with them. We've also heard about the women that over-extend themselves to the point of breaking just to get a guy to notice them or to please him. Isn't that the core of every heartbreaking story?

Here's a classic example, the whole Spederline marriage. She pays all the bills, takes care of his every desire, buys him expensive gifts and trinkets, allows him to drop her money in Vegas on a whim and pretty much pays the way for his life, ambitions and career with her hard-earned money. Sure along the way she's found "love", regular sex and a cute kid but everyone knows that he is enjoying an easy ride and taking advantage of her every chance that he gets.

Then we start to bemoan the fact that he's not treating us right, he's cheating or that he's taking advantage of our generosity and love.

Sweets, open your eyes...most men aren't piranhas preying on weak and helpless women. They are just regular Joes that happen to find a cozy situation and choose to stay with it as long as they can. I'm sure if you got a sweet deal that you didn't have to lift a finger to work, got your bills taken care of, 3 square meals a day, your laundry done and your every wish granted you would do everything in your power to keep the status quo.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not taking the blame away from the guys for being snivelling, lazy wimps instead of the providers and caretakers however I'm saying that we should take responsibility for creating the monster. We are the ones that give them the leeway to take and take and take and take. We are the ones that keep giving and giving until our very essence is dried up.

Let's stop creating the monster. Stop letting your lazy ass fuck boy live with you rent free messing up your house and not even bothering to lift a finger to clean. Stop paying all the bills while he uses his money from his job at McDonald's to party with his boys. Stop messing with lazy, irresponsible boys that don't know how to care for themselves let alone the responsibility of someone else. Stop giving him money to support his habits and his irresponsibility. Stop borrowing him money that you know he's never, ever going to pay back. Stop sleeping with him as a reward for his laziness. Stop allowing yourselves to be used, manipulated and taken advantage of. If you don't stop the abuse, noone else will.

There are great guys who are financially responsible and looking for a great woman like you. So why are you wasting time with a boy that is hiding behind your skirts? Kick him out. Now.

Bad Girls don't play in the sandbox with little boys pretending to be men. We only date REAL grown, responsible men.

Your thoughts?

Labels: Girl Talk

Posted by Vixen @ 12:33 AM :: 9 trainees letting it rip!

Talk to Me!

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